I'M FINE

as i sit here today trying to make sense of my life and all that unfolds i could easily fall into this well known space that brings me down and all that surrounds me,i know its not easy i've heard it plenty of times, but does that make it easier? to be told i'm not alone can be comforting, but what does that really mean? to me its like when you greet someone and ask how they are. more than likely your expecting a "i'm fine"response. what does fine really mean: F*cked up Insecure Neurotic Emotional we smile and say fine and go our separate ways; we know thing are not fine and if someone even tries to express anything other, you see faces and reasons to quickly dissolve the greeting... who are we fooling? why is it so hard for people to reach out?call me stupid but let me tell you that despite all the things that come my way i feel a need to make someones day whether its a complement a joke or just to lead an ear its important, the simple fact of just acknowledging someone is sufficient for them to realize that they are important. in every mind there is a universe and every person has a story, there are many powerful messages out there if only we were to listen. i've mentioned before the extraordinary opportunity that was handed to me at work holding weekly workshops to our homeless population, i've been going there about 4 months now, of course at first i'd share and share some more, about stressors life in general until i shared my story raw and uncut. last week i met an middle aged lady, she soft spoken, petite seemed somewhat average, but what a powerful message did she share; this lady is a recovering alcoholic, homeless at present. she shared a message of hope and perseverance, she shared how she was married and had two children, her marriage ended in divorce and she took to drinking. she kept it a secret for years but it took its toll,at one point in her life she was shot 3 times and left for dead by her assailants and despite all of that she still managed to hit the bottle after escaping death. she searched and seeked that one person that she would identify with, that one person that would acknowledge her; would she then take the leap of faith. today this strong woman with her powerful message has given me hope and strength, i took the time to listen and learn... and for that, today i might not be fine but just simply okay!