Friday, August 15, 2008

BLOOD TAINTED FLAG

as i've mentioned before in another post, i ask must these red flags be tainted with blood? well the answer is yes. yes?? what wrong here, is it me, have i truly gone insane? am i missing the picture or am i just surround by folks that don't give a damn!!! i am speaking literally here i have no freaking clue what the hell is going on right under my nose in my own home with my child i've had problems with cris and his acting out oppositional behavior and his total disrespect but somewhere along the way something is going on in his head that he won't share and he reverts to self mutilation. i looked it up on the web as to get some sort of idea, but that doesn't take away the fact that he's hurting himself i could tell you that i would take the pain away you know that's not real i do not know what to do it just that simple... but simple its not because i care i need resolution i need results and responses to these crys shit SCREAMS there's something remarkable about living in the USA hell i was born here but as long as we whisper all is well these SCREAMS are either not heard or not taken well i've found a bloody syringe in his room OH MY GOD HELP US what do i do i have to face this and talk to him seek help understand whats going on but i can't its not right the police do nothing i guess that its not a crime to inject yourself with your own blood i told the person in charge of the residential program and i have to wait so i wonder what am i waiting for? only two things or cris's residential comes thru and he gets the help he so much needs or i lose my child forever that might sound tragic but when your injecting yourself with i don't know what or your own blood for that matter i don't see a happy ending to that. lord help me help my child, give me the serenity and knowledge i need to face this together. prayer is a powerful tool and that's all i can do right now all has been put in place and whatever the outcome, this too shall pass and the pain will make us strong regardless of how weak i want to be...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I CANT IMAGINE SORRY BUT STAY STRONG I'LL KEEP ON READING

decobooth said...

Bless you for all this, and bless your child! I can't imagine the pain and confusion you must be feeling, but i know God never puts on us more than we can bear, I know that! He makes us aware of that fine line, but never makes us cross it. I haven't added to my blog in a while because of things going on too, nothing to the severity of your situation, but I will be adding as I can. since mine isn't really a journal, I can't really vent much, but it's still therapy in it's own right! God bless you and my best hopes and prayers are with you and your family!
decobooth
apartmental.blogspot.com

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